Just
Thinking Out Loud
How
important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated
instead of just murdered?
Why
do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny
for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
Once
you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes your family picked out
to bury you in for eternity?
Why
does a round pizza come in a square box?
What
disease did cured ham actually have?
How
is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea
to put wheels on luggage?
Why
is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up
like every two hours?
If
a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
Why
are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
Why
do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look
at things on the ground?
Why
do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you
naked anyway.
Why
is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
Why
do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp,
which no decent human being would eat?
If
Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?
If
the professor on Gilligan's
Why
do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to
their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?
Why
does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both
dogs in Disney!
If
Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME junk, why didn't he just
buy himself some dinner?
If
corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is
baby oil made from?
If
electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Why
do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Why
did you just try singing the two songs above?
Did
you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but
when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?
Do
you ever wonder why you gave me your e-mail address
--