If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may
bring a tear or two to your eyes. These great questions and answers are
from the days when "Hollywood Squares" game show responses were
spontaneous and clever, not scripted and (often) dull, as they are now.
Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.


Q. Do female frogs croak?

A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.



Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should
you be?

A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.



Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or
a woman?

A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.



Q. According to Cosmo, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think
that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's
married?

A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?

A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?

A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your
hands while talking?

A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll
give you a gesture you'll never forget.



Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?

A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.



Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?

A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.



Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist
camps. One is politics, what is the other?

A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.




Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?

A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.



Q. Can boys join the Campfire Girls?

A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.


Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a
goose do?

A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?


Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?

A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.


Q. According to Ann Landers, is their anything wrong with getting into
the habit of kissing a lot of people?

A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.